Saturday, June 16, 2007

Hello!

I've always been pretty direct about the things I've wanted in life, so it's been a struggle for me that something that should come naturally hasn't and might not. I have PCOS ( PolyCystic Ovary Syndrome) and do not ovulate like regular women. Although my husband and I haven't waited the normal 1 year amount of time that most couples do before seeking medical intervention, I have a pretty strong feeling that I would still need the help. My doctor have decided to put me on Clomid for the next 3 months and I am exactly 1 day away from starting my first dose! I'm excited but, as usual, a little nervous. I think most of this stems from the fact that the average patient on Clomid is given 6 months to try, but my doctor is only giving us 3 months. I'm a naturally nervous person so having a shorter deadline makes me very nervous.
Anyways, the whole point of me starting this blog was so I could share my experiences on the drug with anyone whose interested. My doctor told me she believes I will do fine on it with maybe a little change in my moods. To me this is funny because as I looked up information countless women were reporting major mood changes and I am super emotional already so I can only hope this won't send me off the deep end.
This hasn't been the easiest journey for me. I thought for sure that when I announced to my friends and family that at 29 years old I have decided, along with my husband, that we are ready to have a baby there would be tons of love and support. Not quite. My immediate family is extrememly supportive and excited and my best friends are too, but there are some that have continually been unsupportive and negative about our choice. I realize that being a fat woman I will have problems, and I fight every day with my own insecurities and issues. Those who are close to me know that I am strong in my involvement in the Fat Positive movement and they're all very supportive of that, but some how when I mention pregnancy my health and energy levels are called into question. Just so everyone reading this knows, my health is perfect. At 250 some pounds I have lower cholestrol than most people, perfect blood pressure, perfect blood sugar, my heart is in perfect condition, and aside from some minor issues that have nothing to do with weight (eczema and anxiety disorder) my only major problem is the PCOS. So if I were 100 pounds lighter I'm sure that these friends would be 100% behind me, but I have my husband's support, my mother and grandmother's support, my doctor's support, and the support of my best friend's, so screw them.
Other friends like to bring up how much our lifestyle will change or our finances. Well, we're homebodies who enjoy DVRing our favorite shows and getting movies from our Blockbuster que. We have 3 beagles and a kitten and on Monday nights we host a radio show on community radio (WMNF 88.5)... so what exactly would we be giving up? The radio show is the only thing we might not be able to bring a baby to after a while, but we have more than willing babysitters-to-be so I don't see a problem there. Finances are tight, but as our officiant and marriage councelor told us, you add another cup of water to the pot. You find a way to make things work. Families all over the world seem to manage every day.
Besides, if I stopped to weigh out every single detail in our lives and how it might or will change I'd never get anything done. I'm no stranger to children, and we are both fully aware of how our lives may change.
So that's our current situation and a peak into our lives. I'll write more about us on occasion, but mainly this will be for me to report on Clomid and TTC (trying to conceive).
Thanks for reading!

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Hey Girl! I wish you the best of luck. Honestly, I had no idea you had been trying for a year. My thoughts are with you two.

~*~ Rita Danielle ~*~ said...

Hey Shel!
We've only been trying for 3 months... I know, my writing can be confusing : ) and that was my big issue. Most couples get a year of trying and then 6 months of Clomid therapy, but we got 3 months of trying and are now starting 3 months of Clomid therapy.
Thanks for the support!
*hugs*

Unknown said...

I wanted to make a comment about the weight issue last time I was here and got distracted so here I am again.

Rita, it really doesn't matter what these people tell you about your health or energy because not only is it just rude, they are also not qualified to make medical evaluations of your health. Obviously your OB/GYN feels confident in your ability to carry/deliver a child or s/he would not have prescribed your fertility meds. Also, in order to have had these other tests you mention I am going to assume you see a primary care physician often as well. If I were you, when I heard one of these comments, I would ask them where they went to medical school.

When I was pregnant some people had the nerve to tell me, after all the things I was already dealing with, that it really wasn't a good idea for me to be pregnant because of my kidneys. My kidneys(!) out of all things... I see a doctor at least once a week (sometimes 3 or 4 times) and I promise you my kidneys were not pregnancy related concern.